Spencer Snaps
by lazywriter123
Summary: This is Reid without coffee. Rated M for some BAD language and rude comments.
1. Chapter 1

Spencer Snaps

I got the inspiration from this by being in coffee shops. I don't really like coffee but I like tea so I go there sometimes for tea and while angry people TRY to get coffee.

I don't own Criminal Minds

Enjoy

Reid and Morgan are at a local diner. They were the only ones there. Reid ordered coffee and Morgan ordered some pancakes.

The waiter is some new teenager with studs and tattoos all over his arms and neck.

It's been fifteen minutes and still no coffee.

Morgan already got his food.

Finally the teen comes back with a cup of ……water?!

"I'm sorry but I asked for coffee, not water" said Reid very politely.

"Yeah whatever I'll get it."

The teen walked away.

"That is guy is pretty rude" said Morgan.

Ten minutes later

The teen comes back with a cup of coffee at last.

However the coffee is ice cold.

"I'm sorry but this coffee is ice cold" said Spencer.

"Yeah it's ice coffee."

Reid stares at him. "I asked for COFFEE, the normal kind with ground coffee beans and sugar and milk on the side."

The teen leaves again and Reid is steaming.

"Reid I know you're annoyed but keep your cool k?"

Reid nodded, took a deep breath and relaxed.

Ten minutes later

The teen brings a cup of warm coffee at least.

Spencer thanks him and takes a sip of the coffee.

Spencer spits it back out and stares at the cup

"What the HELL is this."

"Uh that's a Chocolate latte with a peppermint twist; it's the coffee special of today."

Spencer puts down the cup and takes a deep breath

"Ok I'm going to make this clear. I don't want a chocolate latte with a peppermint twist, I don't want ice coffee and I don't want water. I WANT COFFEE. C-O-F-F-E-E, COFFEE. I wanted it thirty-funking-minutes ago. I will tear off those metal pricings and cram them up your ass, while I rip your balls of and leave them a nice big fat TIP. So get your ass in GEAR and get me a CUP OF COFFEE STAT!"

The teen trembled in fear and Morgan sank into his chair not wanting to provoke him more.

Reid sat back down and took deep breaths.

In about two minutes, the teen came back with a normal cup of coffee.

Reid drank it and had a big smile on his face. They paid and left.

"Wow Reid, you really need coffee to function huh."

"Yep pretty much."


	2. Chapter 2

I don't own Criminal Minds

I decided to add a second chapter for no reason whatsoever. But this time Spencer doesn't get made over coffee.

This is based on an idea I had a while back. A woman who claimed to be an environmental activist or something like that was yelling at this guy at a restaurant for selling meat and not having more vegan foods. She went on and on. She sounded so stuck up it was annoying. I hate it when some people use environmental issues to seem better than everyone else or use eco-friendly products to also seem better. The environment is important because it saves the planet, not to make people look good.

Still, remember to pick up your trash and recycle .

Plus, B.P., stop the oil spill!

Enjoy

The team was finally done with a long case they had in New York City, so they decided to go to a restaurant to relax before they had to fly back home.

The restaurant was a buffet-style place with a large variety of food and even a chocolate fountain.

Spencer got a plate and was ready to attack the buffet. When he got up to the meat craving station, a woman was beat him to it so he waited patiently for the woman to get her food.

"What would you like miss" asked the chief.

"Well…is the pork good?"

"Yes, very tender and juicy."

"…Is the steak good?"

"Yes, its medium rare."

"…is the chicken good."

Spencer sighed but mentally told himself to be patient. He would have plenty of time to get his food.

"Oh sure, it's rosemary chicken tonight."

"Ok…is the veal good?"

Spencer rolled his eyes. "Please lady, I'm starving just pick something" he thought.

"Sure, it's just fine."

"…do you have anything for vegetarians like veggie burgers?"

Spencer eyes bugged out of their sockets. "You joking right" he thought.

"Well…no. Sorry miss."

She got upset and her voice rose a bit. "Well why don't you? Those poor animals. Not to mention the pollution that's caused by the meat industry."

"Lady…I'm sorry but a chief doesn't care about that right now. He is working and people are hungry" Spencer thought.

Morgan, who was right across from them, looked at Reid and gave him the "Don't lose your temper" eyes. Spencer sighed and took a deep breath.

"Miss…I'm kind of busy, I have a lot of people to serve and there's a line behind…"

"No you listen to me! I'll have you know that I run the "Save the animals" group. We take pride in…"

Spencer tapped on her shoulder, "Miss, please pardon me, but can you shut up."

She stared at him with wide eyes. Morgan was stunned. The other teammates also noticed what was happening and were equally as shocked.

"Look I appreciate and respect that you want to help our environment. But yelling at a chief at a buffet isn't a good place to start."

"Look string bean, I'm _talking _here, so…"

"Excuse me, look why don't you knock of the pretentiousness and let us eat. I was just on a case and I am HUNGRY and TIRED. When I have to work, I SPEND DAYS AND EVEN NIGHTS, slaving and working. I didn't come here to listen to underachieving housewife who needs attention."

She was speechless as Spencer went past her to the counter. "I'll have the steak."

He placed some cuts of steak and Spencer walked to the dessert table for some cherry pie.

#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$

The team stared at Spencer with wide eyes. When Spencer looked up from his steak he saw their faces.

"What? Ok I overreacted a bit and I'm sorry."

"Yeah but…you can really tell someone off Reid" said Prentiss.

"Yeah well I have those days where I just have to say something that I rather not say."

OK I MADE THIS A TWO-SHOT STORY. PLEASE REVIEW


	3. Chapter 3

I don't own Criminal Minds

Enjoy

It was a sunny day at the park, the birds were chirping and butterflies were fluttering around the small patches of flowers. The team was enjoying a nice day, having a picnic and playing some football.

"I'm open Morgan" shouted Hotch. Morgan threw the ball to him and Rossi raced to try and steal it from him. Prentiss and Morgan laughed when Rossi accidently knocked him and Hotch over in an attempt to get the ball. Garcia, JJ and Garcia were eating lunch under a shady oak tree. "It's such a nice day to be out of the office" said Garcia. The others nodded in agreement.

Then a group of men went up to the tree and starting kicking away the picnic blanket and food. "Hey what are you doing "shouted JJ.

"This is our regular spot, MOVE" shouted the tallest one.

"Look dude, there are plenty of trees around here, we got here first. So when we leave later you can sit here" said Garcia calmly.

"Shut up, this is our spot, so MOVE."

"No we will not move, go AWAY" said JJ more sternly. The others noticed what was going on wand walked over.

"What's going on" asked Morgan.

"What's going on is this I our SPOT, so leave" the group shouted.

"You guys are disturbing the peace, there are other places to go in this park, so leave the ladies alone" said Morgan.

"LIKE HELL I AM" the tallest one shouted.

He pushed Garcia to the ground, that's when Spencer got pissed.

"HEY, YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO PUSH ANYONE, WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE" roared Spencer.

The group to a small step back, "YOU THINK YOUR SO BRAVE AND BAD-ASS WEARING BLACK LEATHER JACKETS AND TATTOOS! OH LOOK AT US WE CAN ACT LIKE A BIG BUNCH OF ASSHOLES BECAUSE WE CAN PUSH A LADY!"

"Well, hey man…"

"DON'T YOU "HEY MAN" ME! Did your mom not hug you, so you have to pick on other people? Cry me a frigging river. Here's an idea why not get a job and get a life. Since you guys have nothing better to do then pick on us."

The men cringed as Spencer got more and more angry. "No get out of here before you find my shoe crammed up your ass so much that your voice will be like Alvin and the chipmunks!"

Then men ran away, one of them was crying. "You're a crazy person" on cried.

"KEEP RUNNING" Spencer roared at the top of his lungs.

The rest of the team looked shocked but Garcia gave him a big hug. "My hero" she said before kissing his cheek.

Spencer sighed and blushed, "Man your making me look bad" said Morgan.

"Still I really think you need to take some anger management classes" said Hotch.

"Alright" said Spencer.

PLEASE REVIEW


	4. Chapter 4

I don't own Criminal Minds

**I made a fourth chapter…for really no reason! This is based on my absolute hatred for people on buses or any other form of public transportation that talk on their cell phone loudly, endlessly, and using curses left and right. It's one thing to speak quietly or walk away from a crowd of people to take a call and then say "Hey call me in a bit when I'm off the train." But it's something entirely when someone talks so loudly and rudely on the cell phone, especially when their cursing. When I was little a guy next to me and my parents was cursing loudly on his phone and everyone gave him dirty looks. See, kids remember when you curse. **

Enjoy

Spencer and the BAU team were at the train heading for the BAU since it was "Don't drive your car day". A city event where on that day, people use public transportation to save gas and lower smog released in the air for the day (we should have something like that in my hometown).

The train wasn't packed but all the seats were taken so some were hanging on the poles. At one of the stops, a woman came onto the train with a cell phone plastered to her ear.

"NOW YOU LISTEN TO ME! TELL THAT BITCH I WANT THOSE REPORTS IN TODAY! IF YOU DON'T I'LL F***ING KILL YOU!"

Everyone on the train was in shock and some of the children on the train looked a little frightened.

A woman holding her son walked up to the woman and quietly said, "Excuse me could you please not curse so loudly in front of the children here?"

The woman on the phone rolled her eyes and then said, "LOOK IT'S A FREE FRIGGING COUNTRY SO TELL YOUR SON HE COULD GO F*** HIMSELF."

The little boy started to cry as the mother shot her a very dirty look like the rest of the people on the train, Spencer looked very upset.

He walked over to the woman and yanked the phone out of her hand. She snarled at him, "WHATS YOUR F-."

"FIRST OFF WATCH YOUR MOUTH. SECOND I WORK FOR THE FBI BUILDING 15 MINUTES FROM HERE AND YOU'RE DISTURBING THE PEACE BY NOT ONLY SHOUTING PROFANITIES BUT ALSO UPSETING A CHILD. SO GET OFF YOUR CELL PHONE!"

She woman looked a little pale and took her cell phone while putting like a child.

"AND ANOTHER THING YOU'RE A GROWN WOMAN YOU SHOULD KNOW BETTER!"

When the team got off the train, Hotch turned to Reid. "I'm glad you stopped that woman but you really should go to an anger management class."

"I am, after work. I signed up a few days ago."

"Great, good luck in your class."

#$#$#$###$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$

After work, Spencer went to the class which was only a short walk away from the office.

Inside was a circle of chairs and a few people were already there. When Spencer sat down, the teacher showed up as well as the rest of the class…including the cell phone woman from the train.

They shot each other menacing looks.

This was going to be a long few months.

PLEASE REVIEW


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